65. Having CF means when someone is clubbing, we aren’t partying in Miami. Clubbing means the amount of oxygen in the blood is reduced therefore causing fingernails and toenails to bend. Personally I’d rather go to South Beach.
64. Having CF means we don’t necessarily look sick. CF is considered an invisible disease for many. The people who see us doing our treatments and taking our pills see what all CF entails.
63. Having CF is great for leaving a party early for “treatment time.”
62. Having CF means going to appointments quarterly to find out if you need to be hospitalized.
61. Having CF means a tune-up has nothing to do with getting your car fixed. It usually means a two week hospital stay.
60. Having CF means not capitalizing “cystic fibrosis.” It’s not a name. It’s just a pesky disease!
59. Having CF means wearing a mask on a plane is not because we can get you sick; it’s actually the opposite.
58. Having CF means not getting near other cystic fibrosis patients. The actual distance that the CF Foundation recommends is six feet due to bacterial cross-contamination.
57. Having CF means explaining that it’s not asthma. Asthma involves the lungs. CF involves the lungs, pancreas, reproductive system, sinuses, sense of humor, etc. Just making sure you were paying attention on the last one.
56. Having CF means a median life expectancy of 40 in the US. That doesn’t mean we’re all going to keel over and die at 40. It just means that’s the average life span of a CF patient currently, however; if you’re born today, you’re expected to live a lot longer.
55. Having CF means understanding that a lung transplant is not a cure. It’s just a second chance at breathing better however the risk of rejection is a real downer.
54. Having CF means explaining that you have a genetic disease but that doesn’t mean both your parents have it. It just means they at least have the gene meaning there’s a one in four chance you’ll have cystic fibrosis. Approximately 10 million Americans have the CF gene.
53. Having CF means having the number one genetic killer in the United States. Number 2 is being a Cleveland Browns fan.
52. Having CF means being an expert in the art of plunging a toilet as many of us have major digestive issues.
51. Having CF means taking 30 to 40 pills a day and we’re not even senior citizens – however I think any of us can be All-Star shuffleboard players.
50. Having CF means maturing a lot faster than the average person because…well, what choice is there when everything from the time you remember is life or death.
49. Having CF means worrying less about tests in social studies and math and more about tests surrounded by the cold floors of hospital rooms.
48. Having CF means worrying about a cold turning into an infection turning into a hospital stay turning into worse.
47. Having CF means hearing expressions like “You’re fine…for now” and knowing exactly what that means.
46. Having CF means hearing a cure is 7 to 10 years away every year and soon equating it to a prison sentence.
45. Having CF means calling yourself a CF warrior and people ask you where you do CrossFit.
44. Having CF means turning the car around when you forget your enzymes.
43. Having CF means turning into the drug-sniffing dog when it comes to sensing sickness around you and making sure to stay out of harm’s way.
42. Having CF means never smoking a cigarette yet sounding like you’ve been smoking since birth.
41. Having CF means eating nonstop and barely gaining a pound which is actually not a positive though it may sound like it.
40. Having CF means missing out on certain things to live a normal life that is not really normal.
39. Having CF means having children and grey hair are not rites of passage but instead minor miracles.
38. Having CF means doctor’s appointments are not opportunities to worry about flu shots and blood tests but more to worry about potential hospital stays and talk of lung transplants.
37. Having CF means using the closed caption device on your TV not because you are hearing impaired but because your vest and aerosol machine are so damn loud.
36. Having CF means making sure before using any toilet that you make sure there’s a plunger and some Pledge otherwise at least a pen and paper so you can write an apology letter to the owner of the establishment.
35. Having CF means wearing a vest is not to go out on the town.
34. Having CF means paying so much money so you can have insurance to cover meds and hospital stays that cost an exorbitant amount of money.
33. Having CF means having to tell someone on a date that you have a terminal disease and praying that he or she will still want to be with you. Then wondering in your own head if you’re being fair to that person by staying with them.
32. Having CF means the stigma that you are “sick.”
31. Having CF means having an opportunity to make a difference because you are different. It’s an opportunity to have a legacy.
30. Having CF means you get to miss a lot of school days which means binge watching Sanford & Son (I’m old, people).
29. Having CF means you’ll be able to take more pills in a 60 second period than most people in a lifetime…America’s Got Talent anyone?
28. Having CF means being a living, breathing version of Wikipedia for someone who has never heard of the disease.
27. Having CF means looking like a terrorist when going through airport security due to all your machines and meds.
26. Having CF means giving a physician’s assistant carpel tunnel when she tries writing down all of your meds.
25. Having CF means packing like you’re going on a month-long trip when you’re only going for a week.
24. Having CF means the partner you do find will be special because he or she can deal with things that most people cannot.
23. Having CF means learning to appreciate the little things and not to concern yourself with the small stuff.
22. Having CF means your pet will love to lick the salt off of you (if you’re into that kind of thing – not judging!).
21. Having CF means a new set of jokes to tell. What goes good with Chardonnay when you’re coughing? Pulmozyme of course! Okay, maybe this only reaches a small segment of the audience. What’s the only test you can’t study for? A sweat test! I’m here all week.
20. Having CF means knowing the electrical outlet variations of different countries because of all the machines you have to travel with.
19. Having CF means the people who empathize with you most can only be reached through social media or e-mail.
18. Having CF means working out is not an option; it’s of the utmost importance. We don’t live to work out, we work out in order to live.
17. Having CF means CVS calls you for orders.
16. Having CF means having a fulltime job that you do not get paid to do.
15. Having CF means your definition of cultural differences in when your sputum culture comes back with different bacteria.
14. Having CF means waking up early and going to bed late.
13. Having CF means the “I’m such a badass feeling” when you get your meds in the mail after running out that day. It’s the equivalent of letting your gas tank go below E before you fill up.
12. Having CF means the only thing worse than hearing fingernails scratch a chalkboard are the letters “PFT.”
11. Having CF means having more friends in the hospital than out.
10. Having CF means volunteering to be an organ donor is essentially the same thing as being on Craig’s List and trying to sell your broken-down desk and chair from grammar school. Nobody wants them!
9. Having CF means if there is another military draft, you are sitting pretty.
8. Having CF means “Coughing up a lung” could really happen.
7. Having CF means coming up with great acronyms: Coughing Frequently and Constantly Farting to name a few.
6. Having CF means having a great line if you’re trying to get out of a relationship. “I have CF. I could go at any time. You know what. I’m gonna go now. Good night!”
5. Having CF means having a great pickup line. “I can’t get you pregnant. How do you like that? Score!”
4. Having CF means being a risk taker is when you meet someone else with CF and you get within 6 feet of them. You might be the most interesting person in the world!
3. Having CF means flying with a mask on and having the opportunity to pretend you’re Bane from Batman.
2. Having CF means asking for a generator for your birthday so you can keep doing your aerosols and vest when a blackout occurs. Best present ever!
1. And finally, having CF means proving statistics like median life expectancy wrong every damn chance you get!!!